“Tie a Big Blue Ribbon,” by Pr. Charles Henrickson

According to the description of one the parties tomorrow night, “there is a rumor going around that he [CH] will be singing some of his famous theological parodies.” Well, the rumor got started without me, but now I have to be ready to live up to it. So to give you a flavor of what I/we may be singing during my little portion of the evening’s festivities, here’s the latest from yours truly, the wag tailoring the doggerel. Click the music link and sing along!

TIE A BIG BLUE RIBBON
Tune: youtube “Tie a Yellow Ribbon”, local here or audio only here.
By Jerry Expando and DayStar

I’m ‘fraid my power’s in decline
Now I’ve got to get what could and should be mine
If you believed my task force tellin’ you the things I need
Then you’ll know just what to do if you just trust me
If you just trust me

Tie a big blue ribbon ’round the old IC
It’s been eight long years, but I want fifteen
If I don’t see a ribbon ’round the old IC
I’ll blame the speed bumps
Be down in the dumps
Blame the COP
If I don’t see a big blue ribbon ’round the old IC

Convention, please just agree
‘Cause I couldn’t bear to have you look and see
Those really boring details that would take so long to read
The synod’s big blue ribbon’s all you need to see from me
Just vote and say yes, please

Tie a big blue ribbon ’round the old IC
It’s been eight long years, but I want fifteen
If I don’t see a ribbon ’round the old IC
I’ll blame the speed bumps
Be down in the dumps
Blame the COP
If I don’t see a big blue ribbon ’round the old IC

{musical interlude}

Now the whole darn thing is failin’
And I can’t believe I need . . .
A hundred more blue ribbons ’round the old IC!

Becomin’ Rome, mmm mmm . . .

Tie a ribbon ’round the old IC
Tie a ribbon ’round the old IC
Tie a ribbon ’round the old IC . . .

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